Most know by now that I am battling daily with my sidekick ‘Lenny’ (the name I have given my COPD/Asthma) and part of my therapy is to put into words how my week or day is going and then sharing it openly as part of what I call my responsibility.
Responsibility for me is to share my travels with others with the hopes that maybe, just maybe I will reach even one person who could read what I write and realize they are not alone. Using social media I will continue to reach out to others with information, ideas and my own story hoping it may supply someone, somewhere a little insight, a little knowledge and maybe a few questions.
While my buddy ‘Lenny’ (my COPD/Asthma) may not be anywhere near as severe as many, it is bad enough that even though I am not on oxygen 24/7 yet I do find it very, very difficult to work or do anything much physical for more than about 15 minutes without having to stop and let my lungs catch up.
Today I once again share where I am at and maybe how I may or may not be dealing with it.
Many days my biggest battle is not so much with ‘Lenny’ as it is with myself as one of my personality weaknesses is keeping in a routine or on a schedule, which is why I always seemed to do better in jobs where I had a set schedule with things to do and/or places to be or go.
Not having the ability to work a regular job I begin each day with big expectations and ideas for my writing and photography only to get to the end of the day and find myself asking ‘where the heck did the day go’.
Now I have had plenty of stretches where things seemed to mesh together and I seemed to get plenty of writing done and photographs taken, then I will slip up one day, then another, then another and before I know it another week has zipped by and all I have to show for it is daily lists of items not checked off, ideas not started and expectations not met.
I try so hard to set myself up on a schedule, a routine and yet without that regular schedule with a clock in and clock out I seem to flounder around at times like a poor goldfish that jumped out of my grandson’s fish bowl, and I flounder, flounder, flounder until I like give up and go take a nap.
What I do notice is the stress I put on myself sometimes of wanting to get things done and then not getting them done will give ‘Lenny’ an opportunity to use the stress step of those trigger steps to kick in my COPD/Asthma enough to make me really tired and exhausted.
So as much as I know I work best when I have a routine or schedule laid out, it seems without an actual out-right, old-fashioned clock in, clock out job I flounder as being my own boss at times.
The question that is up to me is to fight back and work harder at acting like my writing and my photography is a real job with a real schedule while watching for ‘Lenny’ and his triggers to make sure they don’t fire away at my breathing and energy levels.
Oh and my idea of doing Tai Chi that I shared with you all last week – well that storyline is waiting for next time.
And that my friends is where ‘Lenny’ (my COPD/Asthma) and me are at 4 today.
NOTE TO REMEMBER: Sometimes we share what may seem like medical information, but we are only giving descriptions and highlights of various aspects of having COPD and/or asthma and no way do we ever want our information to be considered medical treatment type of information, always consult your physician for more, clearer and more medical founded information.
As always – if you or anyone you know have any symptoms involving lung and breathing functionality, and they linger over and over while disrupting a lifestyle – then please ask questions and get it checked out.
Remember – a person without breathing is a person without life itself.
I bid to all – smiles, prayers, blessings and steady breathing – Mr. William.
(Copyright@2015, CrossDove Writer through wheezingaway.com)
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